HAI. I'M NOT DEAD. XD

So, yeah. I'm done with university for a few months, so I'm home. The weather's been absolutely miserable. Go figure. 

So, what's been going on with me? Not much at all, really. I can best say that I feel completely and totally disconnected, spiritually. Completely. It's a weird feeling, to be honest. I'd like to start practicing again, but then, I'd actually need something to practice, and I have no idea where I'm going with that. It's almost like I gotta start from the ground up again, do my research (again), and try to see where I fit. I'm calling myself agnostic for right now, but it doesn't quite feel right. The problem is, again, where do I start? D: I always run myself into this bind. I never know what to look for, where to look for it, and then what to do. This seems to be cyclical - every few years I realise I've been going about it all wrong, and then I try to start over again. And then I do the same thing again. And again. It gets annoying. I mean, I understand that I'm supposed to be growing and evolving spiritually, but it's like I can't even get where I'm supposed to start worked out.

I whine too much, don't I? XD I never can make up my mind on anything, I never really feel like I fit anywhere.... gah. I hate this. xPP I'm sure it'll work out eventually, but right now? I feel lost. T.T

I also feel kinda tired. xPP